Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Screen Queen

Last night, the most talked about television programme of the year finally hit the screens. Even before airing, “Monarchy: the Royal Family at Work” had already hit the headlines and resulted in the controller of BBC One losing his job. It was all because an out-of-sequence preview appeared to show the Queen storming out of a photo-shoot with Annie Leibovitz. In fact, the scene showed Her Majesty on the way into the session.

So, after all the fuss, we finally got to see the finished product. Overall, it was entertaining and interesting, although at an hour-and-a-half, a bit too long. Much of the focus was on the state visit by the Queen and Prince Philip to the United States, earlier this year. The Leibovitz session was arranged to provide the official pre-trip photographs, and appeared at the top of the show. The monarchical strop at being asked to remove her tiara to make the shot “less dressy” was the nearest we came to fireworks, but Leibovitz took it all in her stride. No doubt, she’s had more troublesome subjects than Her Majesty.

The rest of the programme showed the preparations for the state visit. Everyone, from the First Lady to the flower girls wanted to make sure everything was just perfect. At the Williamsburg Inn, where the Queen had stayed 50 years before, the chief housekeeper personally attended to the Egyptian cotton sheets, and rather unnecessarily pointed out that a new lavatory seat had been bought to accompany the royal flush.

George W. Bush was almost childlike in his anticipation of the visit, and hoped Her Majesty would ask to meet his mad Scottish terrier. Meanwhile, Laura Bush came across as an engaging, intelligent woman, concerned above all that her visitors should have time to relax and enjoy their time in the White House.

The most annoying aspect of the programme was the frequent references to Her Majesty’s realm. Or, as the Americans constantly called it: “England.” “It’s not every day you get to see the Queen of England”, gushed one woman, “I mean, dinner with the Queen of England has a certain ring to it”, burbled the President.

Meanwhile I’m throwing pop tarts at the screen and screeching “Britain, you cretins, it’s Britain!” Yes, yes, I know that England is often used as a shorthand term for Great Britain, and I also know that many Brits don’t know the difference between Washington, DC and Washington state. But for those of us living beyond the boundaries of perfidious Albion, every mention of the “E” word is like a mass scraping of nails across a blackboard. Even the woman at the bloody British Embassy coo-ed about creating a little bit of England in Washington. Everyone was at it, with one exception.

Along among all the characters great and small appearing in the programme, only Laura Bush referred to “Great Britain”. Laura, we love ya!

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